My Suggestions For The National Anthem

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ignition

If you haven’t heard, someone out there is trying to get the national anthem changed to R. Kelly’s 2003 hit “Ignition (Remix).” Can you imagine this playing before a sporting event? Or every time we win gold at the 2016 Olympics? Incredible.

While I think it’s a solid song, I think there are many more choices that would better serve our country.

  • Run The World – Beyonce
    • Because who run the world? AMUUURICA.
  • American Saturday Night – Brad Paisley
    • Because it’s just another American Saturday night y’all.
  • Don’t Stop Believing – Journey
    • Because you should never stop believing and I’m pretty sure it’s the #1 karaoke song nationwide.
  • Express Yourself – Madonna
    • Because we’re the country that encourages you the express yourself, no matter how weird you are.
  • Black or White – Michael Jackson
    • Because if you’re thinking about my baby it don’t matter if you’re black or white. Equality people. Everyone should love everyone.
  • Born In The USA – Bruce “The Boss” Springsteen
    • Because I was born in the USA. Duh.
  • American Girl – Tom Petty
    • Because we were raised on promises and we couldn’t help thinking that there was a little more to life somewhere else. That’s why everyone immigrated to America in the first place.
  • I Want You To Want Me – Cheap Trick
    • Because in America, we all want each other to want each other. That’s how we make money.
  • Surfin USA – The Beach Boys
    • Because everybody’s gone surfin, surfin USA. East coast, west coast, whatever we’re still the shit.
  • My Girl – The Temptations
    • Because you’re talking bout my girl. Everyone talks about everyone in this country.
  • Go Your Own Way – Fleetwood Mac
    • Because in America, you can go your own way. It’s encouraged actually.
  • Party In The USA – Miley Cyrus
    • YEAH YEAH YEAH BECAUSE IT’S A PARTY IN THE USA ALL THE TIME.
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