Happy Halloween to all of the people who decide to wear ironic and hilarious costumes. If you’re one of those people who try to dress up sexy, go home, put on some clothes and try again next year.
I’m not too much of a Halloween person so my plans for tonight are pretty grandma-esque. I’m planning on wearing my cat ears (because any chance I have to wear them, I seize), maybe putting some eyeliner on my face to emulate whiskers (because I’m too poor/lazy to buy real face paint), blending up some apricot margaritas (because orange means Halloween and it’s only logical), painting my baby pumpkins (because they are adorable and carving is too hard) and watching Harry Potter movies with my roommate (because we both hate scary movies and Harry Potter is the shit).
So you can have your Halloween parties and parades and everything else crazy that comes with this holiday. I’ll be planted on my couch sipping an apricot marg with my cat ears on. Let me tell you, I’ve been looking forward to this all damn month.