Hiiiiiii 2015. I Like The Sound of You.

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I say this every year but I’ll say it again, I don’t really enjoy making resolutions for New Years. I think they put a lot of unnecessary pressure on the person who creates them which then causes that person to feel like a bag of poop when they give up three weeks into January. Instead I like to make wish lists. My wish list consists of things I hope to do or see or experience in the upcoming year. If they happen, cool then my wish came true. If they don’t, maybe the wish fairy had something else even cooler in mind for me.

2015 Wish List

  1. 2015 is the year of do what you want. It’s okay to be selfish sometimes. The people in your life should not make you feel bad about your choices or make you sacrifice your own happiness for theirs. If they do, stick them on a train and don’t look back.
  2. Write. All the time. About everything and nothing.
  3. Share. Share the things you create with the people you trust. They’re going to love you no matter what.
  4. Sparkle. With glitter bombs. With flash tattoos. With twinkle lights.
  5. Read all of the books that you can get your hands on. Fall in love with the characters. Soak up the stories like a sponge.
  6. Take a few trips. Runaway trips. Burn run trips. Vacation trips. Just go places.
  7. Dance. A lot. To every type of music. Even the music that only plays in your own head.
  8. Go see your favorite bands. Spend the money. Regret nothing. Buy the stupid overpriced t-shirts that you love and wear them every chance you get.
  9. Paint new stories to hang on the wall. Replace the old ones but remember why they happened and what they taught you.
  10. You have fire in your words. Use it when necessary.
  11. Make things. Dreamcatchers, flower crowns, poems, stories, memories.
  12. Take lots of Polaroids. Take too many Polaroids and even then know you can never have enough.
  13. Trust your instinct. Continue to be/find out who you are. Love yourself.

One final thought on this New Year. As the clock struck midnight and the ball dropped I had a little epiphany when I looked around at the aftermath of the glitter bomb. Nothing happens unless you make it happen. I wanted my New Years evening to pan out a certain way so I set myself up for complete and utter success. I had macaroons, glitter bombs, champagne, Polaroid cameras and Taylor Swift’s “Style” ready to play at 11:59pm. I set myself up to have the best transition into 2015 as I possibly could with all of my favorite things and with a few of my most beloved friends. No one hands you anything, you have to go get it for yourself. If you want something, you better damn well go get it.

Here’s to many more macaroons, dance parties and glitter bombs in 2015.

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Little Tiny Pieces

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Puzzle

Now having a few days to reflect on my weekend, I’ve realized that I’m pretty damn lucky when it comes to having friends. If you’re reading this and you live in a big city, you know how hard it can be to find people to hang out with and then on top of that, people you can actually trust. It feels like nowadays people are always looking to see what’s in it for them in a relationship, so anytime you meet someone new you have to have your guard up. One of the first questions people ask is “what do you do?” or “who is your boss?” so they can see what kind of “in” you have (if any). People don’t usually ask you “what’s your favorite flavor of slurpee?” or “do you like binge watching Harry Potter marathons?” It’s just not a thing people do anymore. (The answer to those questions would be red & blue mixed and definitely yes.)

So for me to have more than a handful of friends who I trust with most of my life is a very very rare thing, especially in your early 20s. I know many people who have less than a handful of friends and who are struggling because being in a city whether it’s LA or New York or Chicago or Nashville, can be very lonely if you don’t have people around you.

The story of how I met each of my friends varies from person to person. Some I met through a college living arrangement, some I met through friends of friends, some I met through previous jobs and some I met through hilarious situations that cannot be recounted on the Internet. No matter the situation, it seems that with all of them I almost instantly knew that we were going to hit it off. Something in my gut told me that I needed them in my life, or they needed me in their lives and we would be good for each other. Whether the relationship lasted a few months or a few years or forever, we needed each other and the world was going to make sure we stayed put.

Relationships take priority in my life over everything else, I’ve always said that and I believe that with every fiber of my being. If you don’t have people around you who love you and will be your cheerleader when you decide to take that jump into something you’re terrified of failing at, you’re going to fall. As much as we all want to be that independent woman or man who doesn’t need anyone’s help when it comes to taking care of themselves, you can’t be. It’s impossible. Sooner or later a crack is going to start in your magic suit of armor and that crack will slowly expand until one day without warning, BOOM you shatter into little tiny pieces. And when those little tiny pieces hit the floor, you need someone who loves you to pick them up one by one and glue you back together. In your early 20s, there aren’t very many people who are willing to take the time to pick up your little tiny pieces and fix you up so when you find one of those people who will, hold onto them for dear life.

This post is basically just a reflection and a thank you. If you’re still reading my word vomit at this point and you’re one of my friends who has picked up my little tiny pieces before, thank you for taking care of me.

If you’ve still still reading this thing and you haven’t found those people who will pick up your little tiny pieces yet, do not fret. Here’s my two cents worth of advice. Don’t go looking for these people because you’ll never find them. The universe has this weird sense of humor where it drops people in your lap when you’re least expecting them. So they will show up, you just don’t know who, when or how. Speaking from experience, I doubt you’ll find them in a bar so don’t go looking there. Maybe at the grocery store in the cereal aisle or at a mutual friends party where you’re watching the newest episode of New Girl or on a late night run to pick up In N Out. Wherever they are, they’ll be there I promise. You won’t see them coming but you’ll just know deep down in your gut that you found a a keeper.

New Chapter

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In my mind, my trip to New York marked my last holiday for quite a while. The only things I have left on my calendar for this summer are a family wedding in August and a few concerts scattered over the next few months. I’m pulling a “Shopaholic” and putting my credit card in the freezer as to not put any more evil upon the poor innocent piece of plastic.

Along with the literal “freeze” upon my credit card I’m going to embark on a few other phases that I am dubbing my New Chapter. The initial phase involved green smoothies which has been going surprisingly well over the past 2 weeks. The second phase involves staying active which will lead to my last great purchase of the next few months (minus concert tickets because music is the one thing that helps me keep my sanity.) This great purchase is a gym membership. I had one a few years back in college and loved it because of the classes that were offered. I’ve found when I work out and just hit the treadmill or elliptical, my hour long workout feels like 6 because it is so monotonous and you don’t move anywhere. With Pilates or Zumba or Step classes, you’re constantly in motion and working out doesn’t feel forced. Added to these workout classes will be taking advantage of the hills Los Angeles has to offer me by going on more morning hikes on the weekends. Because with views like these, you have to take advantage of it.

The third phase of New Chapter is creating a creative space in my apartment. I’ve been told by many that the living room of my apartment in itself is a very open creative space, which it is. But I think I have become so used to it and have now associated it with other things like eating dinner or watching TV and it has lost the original appeal of being creative. Instead, I think I’m going to make a little corner of the apartment my Creative Corner. I have these beautiful, vibrant colored vintage scarves from flea markets I’ve collected over the years and I think I’m going to hang them all up, Moroccan style on the walls. It will create a space that says “Hi. I’m a safe, creative, open space where you can say whatever you want and dream in words that are as pretty as you want them to be.”

For me, being creative is all about being in the right headspace. If I can’t tap into that headspace where I feel unbound, weightless and free, I can’t write. I mean I can, write something but it’s never as good as I want or know it can be. Hence the need for Creative Corner.

Here are some ideas I pulled from Pinterest for my little Moroccan corner. Pretty, vibrant colors with lots of pillows and seating that is low to the ground. For some reason, sitting or laying on the floor helps me feel more connected to whatever I’m writing. Here we go Morocco. Let’s paint with pretty words.

Morocco 1

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Morocco 3